CCToday's Christmas Wish List for 2011
It is our tradition to suggest the blessings and curses appropriate for our fellow Cape Codders whose fanfares or fiascoes have helped fill our news-hole this year.
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through Cape Cod,
and time to "pull legs" with the gentlest of prods.
First to my fellow eCapers who labor so prodigious,
A huge Christmas dinner, and your spouse does the dishes.
To all our bloggers who make this site rock.
Lots of ideas to ridicule and miscreants to mock.
To Dave and Phil Scudder the Hy-line Cruise bros,
Our atmosphere's thanks, plus environmental kudos.
The Falmouth Library Trustees, a tutorial -
Don't block a vet's memorial.
And I won't forget Sandwich - HQ for KKK,
Why else would they treat footballers that way?
Let's give Wareham its own prison, their miscreants to banish,
Just get your kids away from the Triangle in Hyannish.
To Cape Cod's politicos who next year seek our vote,
May you all get elected (hey, that's just a joke).
To Congressman Keating, whose 10th District was shorn,
A permanent move to his summer home in Bourne.
For new Senator Dan Wolf, what could be finer,
For his commute to Boston a Boeing Dreamliner.
To Rep Sarah Peake who we've all gotten use-ter,
New District lines that now include Brewster.
To Rep. Cleon Turner a slide further west,
Now even Yarmouth will experience the best.
To ex-Town Manager Klimm, who will bounce back we're sure,
A little vacation before his next sinecure.
To "The Michael" O'Keefe who gives much excitement,
A Happy New Year with no federal indictment.
To muckraker Manso as he and O'Keefe bout,
A best-selling status for his book "Reasonable Doubt."
To Democrats here as they drift to the right,
A new name for their party - GOP sounds about right.
To Cape Cod's Republicans as they disappear from sight,
It was fun while it lasted, sleep well and good night.
To the nice folks at Cooperative Bank of Cape Cod,
A new web address which isn't so odd.
To the Cape Cod Commission and its anti-business creed,
It's time to expire, we've outgrown your need.
To Mashpee "Praying Indians" who forgot Jesus Christ,
A conversion to their old gods - hey, they got a good price.
To Orleans' DPW for their Cove Road repair role,
A deep hole to hide it and a small lump of coal.
To our police and firemen who work day and night,
No one plays with the matches and everyone drives right.
To Bob Dwyer at the museum of our nature, so dear,
A thousand new donors to greet the New Year.
To Cynthia Stead, a bizarre change of will,
And a return to her Liberal youth on Blue Hill.
To Cape Cod Healthcare, every doc, nurse and lackey,
A quiet New Year when no visitor goes wacky.
To Felis at Alberto's who hosted our Christmas fete,
A thousand good reviews - every one of them neat.
To Clean Power Now for their long, well fought fight,
Retirement at last, may your future be bright.
To Jim Gordon at Cape Wind, as he heads for the wire,
No more opposition, and another big buyer.
To our friends at Cape Cod Times, may ad space cease to taper,
And everyone on Cape Cod subscribe to your newspaper.
To the folks at Cape's weeklies, short staffed and ill-paid,
Generous publishers who make their wage woes all fade.
May our eight Public Radio station's staff start to smile,
As thousands and thousands more turn to your dial.
May Bob Whitcomb at Projo at last reach his goal,
A well-financed dotage some place near Woods Hole.
To the gang at The Globe, the end of its groaner,
When a liberal local becomes its new owner.
For Cape Cod TODAY, an internet heaven,
As more dig our motto: "Cape Cod 24/7."
To my hard-working wife Pat, who says "all is forgiven."
"You can still write this column and not work for a living."