Naughty or nice? Cape Cod Today's Christmas Gifts for 2017

No need for an Elf on the Shelf in our newsroom...
This 1881 illustration by Thomas Nast helped form the modern image of Santa Claus

We are pleased to present our spoof annual “Christmas Gifts” for those both naughty and nice.  This is an editorial spoof.  Get over it!

Thanks to all of you, dear readers, for a successful 2017 and beyond.

A shiny new bus for Cape Cod Regional Tranist Authority for extending Free Fare Wednesday to make public transit even more accessible to our seniors

A gold watch, a generous pension and a long life to Barnstable Police Chief Paul MacDonald as he stands down for retirement this spring after a lifetime of protecting the residents of his town.  Well done, sir!

A one-hour "Pause-and-Reflect" button for County Commissioner Ron Beaty, to be applied to all social media posts no matter how benign. 

A big, warm hug to Cape Cod Five's David Willard, who retires this week.  Countless Cape non-profits have been blessed by his mentoring.  We hope he will "Carry On" his good work in retirement.

Long lines of customers for Chick-fil-A Cape Cod for leading the way in starting wages on Cape Cod and for their generous community spirit.  "The Chicken That Roared" was heard across the nation!

A big, blue bucket of love to Eastham Ace Hardware for their outstanding efforts to raise funds for Boston Children's Hospital with "Helpful Bucket" and "Stocking Stuffer" sales.  Ace IS the place!

Blessings of the season to Latham Centers for their outstanding work with special needs clients - and for stepping up with a $15/hour starting wage.

A truckload of laptops and school supplies for the Masonic Angel Foundation, for all its good work in our community.

A sugar plum fairy for Cape Tech's Bob Sanborn for the landslide win on their new building.

A fat lump of coal for Cape Tech's Hidden Cove Restaurant for their "no soup for you" buffet - right after taxpayers voted them a new building.

A special Emmy Award to our colleagues at Lower Cape TV for their excellent local news productions, often shared via Cape Cod Today.

Endless purrs and licks for our local animal shelters for helping unwanted pets find loving homes.

A partridge in a pear tree for Cape Wildlife Center, Wild Care Cape Cod and Wellfleet Bay Sanctuary for their efforts on behalf of wildlife - and for educating the public on wildlife-related issues.

A long waiting-list of students for the Cape Cod Community College aviation maintenance technology program

Baked goods and food platters galore for the Cape's public safety professionals for keeping us all safe, taking down the bad guys - and still finding time to do great programs like "Shop With A Cop", "High Five Friday's", Secret Santa and more.

A giant teddy bear for State Rep. Tim Whelan, for his tireless advocacy while still finding time to play Santa Claus for the kids.

A heaping helping of love to Pat Brooks for her wonderful restaurant reviews on Cape Cod Today.

A sleigh full of tech toys to Walter Brooks for his continued guidance and inspiration to Cape Cod Today.

A giant steamer trunk and a ticket back to where-ever she came from for Stony Brook School principal Mary Patricia Allen - farewell and good night!

A warm, loving embrace to all the members of Cape Cod Synagogue for providing Christmas dinner to those alone on the holiday.

A golden mitre to satirist Cardinal Borgia for his re-emergence this week.

A big cup of holiday cheer to the faithful readers of Cape Cod Today.  Merry Christmas to all! welcomes thoughtful comments and the varied opinions of our readers. We are in no way obligated to post or allow comments that our moderators deem inappropriate. We reserve the right to delete comments we perceive as profane, vulgar, threatening, offensive, racially-biased, homophobic, slanderous, hateful or just plain rude. Commenters may not attack or insult other commenters, readers or writers. Commenters who persist in posting inappropriate comments will be banned from commenting on