Writing to Your Loved One Who is Addicted



Sounds crazy, huh? Writing to your loved one addicted to drugs or alcohol!  Looking back, I wished I had thought of that before losing Richie or Lori. We often feel things, but we can't express them, therefore, we never say them. The effect of alcoholism fogs our minds with emotions. We are afraid to reach out, whether you are the addicted or a family member. 

Honest words of feelings can make the sick understand why we reach out to them with fights, hard words, disappointment, punishment: which we are really trying express our fear of losing them and our deepest love at the same time.

The addicted don't communicate with us, when maybe they want to connect to us as a family. It is a useless cycle of avoiding the topic of what is killing many of us; Alcoholism. The substance abusers and the family members suffer from nerves, breakdowns, hopelessness and death.

This is a "Family Disease." Where does it stop? How do we stop it? Why are we told to let the abuser make the decisions on their own, and how can we help them reach out for recovery? Too many reach the point of having their organs shut down and are left with no strength to pull out? What about the abuser who isn't strong enough to get to a hospital or reach out to professionals?

As a woman who had lost a husband and daughter to alcohol abuse, it isn't easy sitting back and watching a loved one die slowly day by day. More pain comes from the counselors who say that parents can't get into counseling to help them, because the addicted patient refuses and is protected by the Patient Privacy Act.

How can the sick make a healthy decision with their lives when it's in their court to decide? Their brains are fried from years of drinking or using. By now, their only wish is to drink themselves to death or take that last over-dose.

They may be beyond reaching. Parents or relatives should be able to intervene when the sick can't save themselves.

Writing to them can help, but showing the love and desire to help them is more strong in reaching the addicted. They want to see more than hear that we are waiting for them to turn to us.

Any action is better than none. If you can't say the words out loud, than write it. "Show" the love.

Alberta Sequeira

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Visit her blog: "Journey Through Alcohol Abuse" at www.albertasequeira.wordpress.com

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